Duke Nukem, 80s Action Star

Duke Nukem, 80s Action Star is the 9th episode of Game Theory on The Game Theorists.

Description
Pull out your AK-47 and rip off your shirt 'cause we're diving headfirst into 80s action flicks to discover the roots of Duke Nukem and the reasons why the character "doesn't really work in 2011."

Transcript
Pull out your wad of singles and don't forget to pack your bubblegum, ‘cause it's time to hail to the king, baby. Hello internet, and welcome to game theory. Just to warn you, this week's video is rated T, for testosterone, because we're looking at a guy who's been getting a lot of bad press lately: Duke Nukem. As part of his sound thrashing from critics, he's been called a relic from the past, crude and unfunny, and quite simply, a jerk. To quote from Giant Bomb’s review of the game, “the character simply doesn't work in 2011”. So that's our challenge this week, To analyze the bravado of Duke, pick apart the machismo, and see the character for what he truly is. By the end, we'll have a better idea of why his game, seems so out of place today. It'll come as no surprise to fans of the series that Duke is a product of the 80s action movie, when bodybuilders were movie stars and mumbling one-liners while running around topless and communists infested jungles was the norm. But just how much of the king is ripped from this genre? Let's start with his appearance. According to the packaging for the Duke Nukem character memory card, Duke is 6’4’’, and weighs in at about 240 pounds. Now, many have equated his look to those of the Governator, Arnold Schwarzenegger, because long before he was protecting Americans rights in an office, he was defending them with an ak-47 against extraterrestrial super hunters. But despite weighing in at 240 pounds, he only stands at 6’2’’, and doesn't have the fluorescent blonde hair or perfectly square face of the Duke. Instead, Duke's physique comes from Dolph Lundgren, or should I say Ivan Drago, the Soviet boxing machine in 1985’s Rocky 4. Besides the hair and chiseled face, he stands at 6’4’’, and, at his heaviest, weighed 245 pounds, practically an exact match to Duke Nukem. Regarding the rest of the character’s look, practically everyone from this era wore the jeans and tank top getup, leaving only his omnipresent Duke vision sunglasses. These, are clearly stolen from the 1988 movie, They Live, in which a special pair of sunglasses gives the hero the ability to see undercover alien creatures, and the subliminal messages they put out in our advertisements. No joke, but it is hilarious, featuring some of the biggest what the **** moments I've ever had watching a movie. South Park's famous cripple fight, is practically an exact replica of a five minute long fight scene in the middle of the movie, right down to the dialogue. It's an instant play on Netflix, so watch it now. Right now. Pause this movie, and watch it. I'll still be here. Did you like it? And how about that ending? So random, right? Just out of nowhere. Anyway, while watching, you might have noticed, this little moment. “I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I am all out of bubblegum.” Remind you of something? Maybe it's just a coincidence. “Blow it out your ass.” (Also from They Live) -or maybe not. In fact, practically all of Duke’s repertoire comes from film. Here are some more highlights: 1987, Full Metal Jacket. “I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck” 1988, Die Hard, and it's sequels. “Yippie-ki-yay, mother f**ker”. Apocalypse Now of ‘79. “I love the smell of napalm in the morning.” Pulp Fiction, 1994. “I'm gonna get medieval on your ass.” Sudden Impact in 1983. “Go ahead. Make my day” Predator, 1987. “You are one ugly mother f**ker.” But probably the biggest contributor to Duke's smartass personality and stockpile of one-liners, is Bruce Campbell AKA Ash from the Evil Dead series, especially the final installment, Army of Darkness. Cue the montage. “This is my boomstick...groovy...Good. Bad. I'm the guy with a gun. Come get some...hail to the king baby”. ‘But MatPat! Army of Darkness is from 1993!’ Well researched, hypothetical viewer, but remember, in the first game, there was only an image, in the second, only the phrase, “I'm back”. It wasn't until Duke Nukem 3D in 1996, that we finally got to see, and hear, the full Duke persona that we know today. And what we heard was really just a YouTube mashup of the best, most memorable, and hardcore lines from cinema. And the movie references aren't just limited to the catchphrases. Driving around in a massive truck? Big Trouble in Little China in 1986. The shrink ray? Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, 1989. Women impregnated with alien chest bursters asking to be killed? Aliens, 1986. Even his name, his name, the one thing you would think would be sacred comes from somewhere else. The first Duke Nukem game, for a while, was named Duke Nukum, instead of Duke Nukem. Subtle, I know. With a U instead of an E. Why? Because of Captain Planet. If all you children of the 80s will recall, Duke Nukem was the name of the radioactive terrorist, and thing look alike, battling the powers of eco friendly propaganda in the show. The makers of the game, afraid that the name Duke Nukem with the E was trademarked, temporarily spelled Duke’s name, with a U. Until they found out that no trademark existed, when the E finally came back. Bruce Campbell, again Ash, from Army of Darkness, an unknowing scripter of Duke’s most famous lines, said it best. “Maybe they're just cheese balls who can't conceive of an original idea. Imitation is indeed a form of flattery, but paying a guy, is an even better form.” Which brings me to, my final thought. Today we've seen that Duke is part communist boxer, part recap of 80s one-liners, part eco-terrorist, and a hundred percent product of other sources, but, so what? Does this automatically make him a bad character or, out of place? In fact, it seems to me like he has more character than most video game heroes today. So what's the problem? Well, the moral of the story can be found in the career of another king from 80s action: Sylvester Stallone. With Rocky, and Rambo in the ‘70s and ‘80s, he was on top. Then came the ‘90s and ‘00s with skinnier good guys, special effects, and the influence of martial arts choreography. Heroes were no longer hyper masculine guerrillas spraying gunfire willy-nilly. They became strategic, calculating killers like Jason Bourne, or Uma Thurman in Kill Bill, Neo in The Matrix. Now, over 30 years after the first Rocky, what is Stallone doing? Rehashing the same franchises with Rambo, again, and Rocky Balboa, or else trying to get the gang of old stars together for movies like The Expendables. Names like Dolph Lundgren, Bruce Willis Arnold Schwarzenegger, all guys that have influenced the Duke, all clinging to the glory days, and all replaced by newer models. It's like Toy Story but with big beefy men toting massive weaponry. And so they fumble about to find a balance between their old work, and the new tastes of audiences, trying to re-establish their place on the shelf, and instead falling into mediocrity, which brings us back around to Duke. Another expendable, another lost ‘80s action star awkwardly combining badassery, with running for cover. Rejecting tropes like power armor, but having to embrace regenerating health. His arrogance might have been easy to welcome back, had the game just trusted the old game play, or else fully embraced the new innovations, but instead, the cockiness rings false, because it's coming from a guy who has no place. Who doesn't know how to fit in anymore, and isn't confident enough to forge his own path. It pains me to say it, but, it's hard to be the king when you lost your throne over a decade ago. But hey, that's just a theory. A game theory. Thanks for watching.

Trivia

 * In the week of this episode's release, MeFeedia user Onirayushizobura interviewed MatPat.